| There's
a fine line that exists between those that create and those
that participate. It's a barrier that it best left unbroken;
the television show writer carefully scripts and plans out
an episode that is taken by a production team and brought
to life for viewers to enjoy. You can imagine the barrier
to be something as tangible as a television screen or something
as intangible as the idea that a writer is being paid to create
that work. This subtle difference may not seem important at
first, but then consider how one of the more bizarre side
effects of modern multimedia entertainment is the desire by
rabid fans to help, uh… "create" new works
for the universe in which a television show, movie, or book
is set. Without that distinct line marking the difference
between creator and participant, you end up with something
terrible: FAN FICTION.
Now
it's possible that fan fiction ("fanfic") has really
been around for centuries--an atheist might point out that
from her point of view, the bible is an early case example
of fans taking writing into their own hands. The idea of historical
fanfic is valid, although it's dubious that Gerrold the Privy
Tender was crafting his own new Canterbury Tales
for the enjoyment of his friends. Still, the creative wannabe
has existed in many forms over the ages, but it's only been
in our modern era of mass communication that he or she has
been given the tools to thrust their efforts upon not only
like-minded fans, but countless innocents that are simply
using the internet to find nude pictures of Sarah Michelle
Gellar.
And
now, let’s examine a scene authored as a typical fanfic:
---
It
was warm inside the cockpit of the Millenium Falcon. There
was a smell of burned electronics in the air. Burned electronics
in the cold of space. In his usual pilot’s seat where
he sat, Han Solo peered with intensity at the ship’s
scanners, looking for signs of Imperial Ships--ships that
they had just narrowly evaded.
“Okay
Chewie,” Han said, still looking at the instrument panel,
“I think we finally lost them.” A little bead
of sweat gathered on his brow, which he wiped away with his
gloved hand.
Chewbacca,
a heroic mass of hair sitting next to him, made a Wookie noise
to show his agreement. His friend Han had come though again.
Leia,
who had been sitting behind the two of them, leaped to her
feet, pointing an accusing finger at Han. “We might
have lost them, but you almost got us all killed in the process!”
she yelled, face flushed with anger.
Han
raised his gloved hands in a look of innocence. “Take
it easy, your worship! I’d like to see you evade half
the star fleet while dodging asteroids. And personally, I’d
take my chances with the rocks over getting caught by those
cruisers.”
Leia
now looked sulky, like a child whose toy had been taken away.
But she was beautiful, her ivory cheeks still pink with heat.
“Honestly,”
she said, “sometimes I don’t know who’s
a greater danger to us--Vader, or you.”
With
that, she wheeled on her feet and pushed her way out of the
cockpit of the Millenium Falcon. Han watched her go, angry,
but still attracted to her. Like the fighting only drew them
closer. After a pause, he turned to Chewie and jerked his
thumb toward the door.
“How’s
that for gratitude?” he said, settling back down into
his pilot’s chair. “Come on Chewie, let’s
figure out what’s broken.”
---
And....
end scene!
Dreadful
stuff, eh? Granted, I used Star Wars as example here
(tastefully choosing not to write about Leia’s “erotic
adventures” in that gold bikini from Jedi),
but I think it’s fair to say that fan fiction is much
more prevalent in the world of television. It’s out
there for everything from Star Trek and Buffy
the Vampire Slayer to even old sitcoms like Gilligan’s
Island--I think a lot of people just have unresolved
issues about the complex relationship between Mary Ann and
Ginger.
So
if you’re an aspiring screenwriter or author, know the
warning signs. If you’re working on developing material
for someone else’s franchise, take a good long look
at what you’re putting down on paper--the border between
legitimate work and fanfic can be a nebulous one--one side
will get you paid, the other will get you derision.
And
if you live in your parent’s basement, you really didn’t
need to read this. You can just go back to your word processor. |
