Sure, oft times “good” people have experiences that are “bad.” So often, in fact, that there is a saying to that effect. Maybe life is just chaotic and stuff just happens. Or maybe, if you believe in an all-knowing guiding force, there are lessons to be learned in the bad things that befall the good people. Maybe they grow stronger, learn to appreciate this or that, etc.

Be that as it may, why the hell do GOOD things happen to BAD people? An asshole strikes it rich while a perfectly kind and caring person can’t afford a place to live. A rich fat fuck throws away the uneaten half of his third lunchtime burrito in front of a decent kid who doesn’t have a bite to eat. Many a bad person lives life free of loss and pain while there are good people who know both all too well.

The mentality of "They'll get theirs when they BURN IN HELL!" probably helps a lot of people get through the day when they notice too many assholes finishing first. Indeed, a certain type of afterlife believer can try to boil it down to believing that -- even if they’re living the high life now -- bad people go visit Beelzebub after they die, and the good folk who are maybe suffering here on earth will get their just desserts of happy in Care-A-Lot -- I mean, Heaven.

But what if there is no Heaven above us? No Hell below us? Imagine that! Then what happens? Some good folk suffer though pointless shit made all the more pointless by no afterlife take backs? Meanwhile, the assholes who live it up here on earth die of old age while sleeping with a beautiful person of their preferred gender in the biggest of their three mansions and... what? No lessons learned? They just live it up as dipshits then, “poof”! Gone? Just as gone as the decent folk who suffered in life?

OUTRAGE!

That right there might be a great reason to believe in Heaven and Hell. Just for the sake of balance. Making things right.

Still, how about all bad folks get shit upon in the HERE and NOW? What's the point of any rotten person getting to live it up before they break rocks for Satan or whatever for all eternity? Same with good people -- why should any truly swell person have to suffer through tragedy and cling to the hope that there’s something better after this shitty life?

I hate thinking. Lord knows I hate thinking, but… still… life shakes down unfairly too often not to call bullshit. It doesn’t add up. Good things should happen to good people. Bad things should happen to bad people. Heck with the reverse. I don’t mind being simplistic here. This should be simple -- very, very simple. You treat people like shit; you get shat upon. You act nicey nice; you get to live it up.

Yet there are so many people out there who are mean to others, who start problems or don’t care who they hurt, who are only in it for themselves -- and they’re still blessed with lives of luxury and are just genuinely honky dory through and through! It’s not all Ebenezer Scrooge, with the feelings of guilt and deep down regret and sadness, where lessons can be learned and life changes made. We all know of people who just do whatever they hell they feel like, never minding how they might hurt others, and get what they want anyway. They step on others and neglect others, and yet… they’re allowed to enjoy full success in life.

How about this? Next time you see an asshole, no matter his/her relation to you or his/her social status or power, tell him he’s fat. Tell her she smells bad. Just out of the blue. “You’re fugly and totally unloved. Thought you should know.” It might make you technically an asshole for that moment, too, but we have to keep these genuine assholes in check somehow. Let’s not wait for some hoped for afterlife run by God or Fate or Pixie the Magical Sunlight Sprite to even the score. Someone who steps all over others shouldn’t be allowed to be happy, and maybe sometimes the nice folk have to put aside their predilection toward doing the right thing, if only for a brief moment, to righteously fuck with the bastards.

Does feeling that way make me a bad person?